Robert Manners

The Friday...Ten?

Once again I missed a week of Friday Five-ing. And once again I make up for the past while catching up with the present. But this time, the Fifth Question is not the same for both weeks! So we have ten instead of nine. Are you confused yet? Read on:



Last Week's Friday Five



1. What's your favorite animal? I really love elephants. I don't know why. I also love cows, and again can't say why. I guess they're just so peaceful and big. As pets, I love dogs (especially little teeny-tiny itty-bitty dogs).



2. What pets have you had in your lifetime? Hmmm...when I was five, I had a mutt named Rusty, who I saw run over by a semi; later we had a mutt named Whistlepig (because she made whistly noises and looked like a black pig), who drowned under suspicious circumstances (I suspect my evil stepfather); then we had a black labrador named Coffin who survived being hit by a car, being shot, and falling out of an upstairs window, but who finally died of malathion poisoning back in the Fruit Fly Panic of 1982; later I had a white collie (mixed, obviously) named Alexander, who died of food poisoning; we had various cats in the course of my life, though the only one I really remember was Calico (a tortoiseshell tabby, obviously), who scratched my neck and infected my lymph system with tuberculosis, which resulted in having a lymph node removed from under my chin, leaving a really unattractive scar that makes my chin droop (I never liked cats much, but since then have hated them with a passion); I've had fish, but never got attached to any of them, they usually died pretty fast; I had a budgie named Sebastian who died of starvation when I forgot he existed (after two months, his chirping became a background noise, like the freeway and the refrigerator, which I only noticed when it stopped); most recently we had a dog named Maggie, a lhasa apso...after going blind, she fell off a balcony and broke her back, so we had to put her to sleep.



3. Is there any specific pet that you've wanted but never had? Why? Well, I really want another dog, but look at the above paragraph: my mere ownership seems to constitute cruelty to animals. But if I thought I could care for it, and that I wasn't pet-cursed, I would love to have either a shih-tzu or a pug. I just love both of those breeds, they're so quiet and cute.



4. Are you allergic to any animals? No. Just plants.



5. Do you have any 'pet' pet peeves (your pets or others')? The very existence of cats bothers me. Though I am polite to my friends' pets, and would never willingly harm a pet, cats always make me want to pick them up and throw them far away. I am also rather irked by people who have repulsive pets (rats, snakes, tarantulas, iguanas) and try to convince you that these vermin are loveable. They are NOT loveable, which is why such people want them...they like shocking people.



This Week



1. What is your favorite time of year? Autumn, I think...though I like all seasons fairly equally. In Northern California, they aren't really all that different from one another.



2. What is it about your favorite season that, well, makes it your favorite season? Indian Summer is the best weather in the Bay Area, and always comes in October; it's a season of beginnings, with school starting and all that; though the weather here isn't all that seasonal, there is a certain type of day that mostly only happens in autumn, when the sun is shining but there's a light and icy breeze that smells of fresh water. Besides, I simply love the word 'autumn.'



3. What is your least favorite time of year? Why? August and February. I am always physically/mentally depressed those times of year.



4. Do you do anything to celebrate or recognize the changing of seasons? My Grandmother looks up from the paper and says, "It says here that today's the first day of [insert season here]"; I reply "So it is. Hmm." And that's pretty much it.



5. What's your favorite thing to do outside? There isn't anything I enjoy outside that can't be done just as easily inside, except for walking. I love long walks, and while I enjoy walking in malls and don't mind using the treadmill at the gym, I prefer to go around the lake or through my own hilly, woodsy, residential neighborhood.



And the Traditional Friday Five (or Nine or Ten) Beefcake Punctuation: