The SssshhheduleSo I had dinner with my sponsor tonight, and we've both decided that what we each need most in our lives is structure. And I don't mean the overpriced pseudo-Italian mall clothes, either. So aside from setting up a regular appointment for a weekly sponsor/sponsee phone call, I am going to develop a weekly schedule...and I'm going to stick with it, too.
First thing, I have to get up every day at the same time. Not just set the alarm, but actually get my tired naked ass out of the bed and both feet on the floor headed to the bathroom...at, say, 8:30am (nice round number, all circles). On Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, I will start the coffee, grab a big bottle of water, and do 45 minutes of aerobics before showering and dressing; on Tuesdays and Thursdays I will pray or meditate or write for 45 minutes. Maybe eat a spot of breakfast. Reward myself with a bit of TV. Then off to the office no later than 10:30 (so as to get there before 11). Once there, I will make an effort to eat my lunch at 1pm every day. But I simply cannot plan my workday very closely, since too many factors go into making up my daily workload (or lack thereof). Then out around 5:30, no later than six, unless unavoidable. Eat dinner at 7:30 (or thereabouts...I can't control that unless I do all the cooking...and really, darling, just one major lifechange at a time, ok?) Then free time, of course, until 11 pm, at which time I will get my tired naked ass back in the bed. Hopefully I'll be able to go to sleep within the hour, since the whole getting-up-in-the-morning business is best if I have my full eight hours.
That's the daily thing. On Mondays at 7 I'll call my sponsor. Tuesday at 8 is my regular AA meeting, which is generally followed by going out for coffee (note to self: no more caffeine-coffee after 7:30). Wednesday is my singing class, which will throw dinner off because it's from 6 to 9. Thursdays are "Must See TV"...that's NBC's tagline, but really all of my favorite TV shows come on Thursdays...Friends and Will & Grace on NBC, A&E's Mysteries to Die For (usually Poirot), and generally something good pops up somewhere else later on. Fridays I often go out with Caroline and/or Shiloh for dinner and a movie. There are also good AA meetings on Thursdays and Fridays, so I should make more of an effort to attend these.
Of course, Saturday and Sunday are free-form. I will sleep as much as possible. But everything else will just happen on its own. I have to have some squish-room in my life.
Well, anyway, that's my new thing: a schedule. I have never successfully instituted a schedule in my life that wasn't imposed from beyond (like school)...but sometimes you just get sick of being an amorphous procrastinating mess. And the only way to get rid of a bad habit (like messiness) is to crowd it out with a replacement habit (like neatness). And you can't "try" or "someday" things like that..you have to "just freakin' do it and quit yer bitchin'!" I can at least make myself do it for a week...if that doesn't kill me, I'll do if for a month...and if I survive that, I'll do it for a year. Every level I survive leads to the next level until I drop dead (at which time I will get some rest).
I'll let you know how it works out, darlings.