Robert Manners

Acacia Allergy Aggravation

Huh? What? Um. Who? Oh, yeah, I'm blogging. Hi! Welcome. What? How are you?



Okay, the Allergies are here for real this time. The acacia pollen is so thick I can taste it in the back of my throat every time I breathe...that is, when I actually manage to draw a breath into my poor clogged-up lungs. Then there are the roses in front of the office, and in front of my house, so I have to hold my breath when I run between the car and the door...which struck me as funny today, since if I "Stop to Smell the Roses," I would spend the rest of the day in a sinusitic coma. I'm sleeping badly because I can't breathe very well, so I'm having all sorts of nightmares about being in close places or not being able to scream.



So in order to breathe, I have to take Sudafed to keep the passages open. Unfortunately, this medication also makes it difficult to sleep, being somewhat of a stimulant and also a diuretic, so I have to get up in the night to pee a lot. It also makes me very stupid...people talk to me and I don't really understand them, the phone confuses me, I can't find anything, and I feel like my whole head is about to float away. But I guess that's better than the pressure and pain that would come if I didn't take the pills...I flipped a coin, and Stupid won over Miserable.



Of course, being stupid just puts me on a more equal footing with my fellow man. It's rather pleasant to answer the phone and think that the caller's questions are perfectly reasonable. I have more sympathy with those people who get to the front of the line at the lunch counter without having any idea what they want to eat. I feel a great kinship with those people who drift across three lanes of traffic without using their turn signals (I am only driving the three miles to and from the office while medicated, and it takes every ounce of concentration I have). Even TV ads make sense now.



On the plus side, either the light-headedness or the clogged-lungedness is keeping my appetite supressed, particularly my appetite for sweets. I just gave my coworker some chocolates from my bottom-drawer stash, and felt absolutely no compunction to eat any of them myself. I barely ate my dinner last night, and didn't want any cookies at the meeting later. When I was at the store, I walked by the Jelly Belly display and didn't even slow my stride. Maybe if this goes on for a while, I might just get out of the candy habit...so this might be a sterling weight-loss opportunity in disguise.



On a completely unrelated topic, my hair looks great! I just started using a new leave-in conditioner, Aussie brand, and my hair is so manageable and silky!



Hey, maybe I can be stupid and thin and pretty! This allergy thing might not be as bad as I thought it was...I may even go back to being blond, just to make a complete package!



And speaking of blonds with complete packages: